So far BFing is not going so well.
Starting back at the hospital, Avery came out and was put on my chest with her little tongue going crazy. She all ready had a sucking reflex and went straight to the bre.ast. I thought oh, this will be so easy!
Well it turns out she had an awful latch and just that one feeding caused damage and blistering. It doesn't help that I am so pale (I guess that makes you more susceptible to damage and bleeding from BFing).
The next few days in the hospital I only BFed. She would struggle with latching and I didn't know what was right and wrong, so she continued to damage me.
On Wednesday afternoon, a Lactation Consultant came to see us and spent an hour with Ray and I showing us what we need to do. She gave me a ni.ppple gaurd, which helped with the pain alot. She also showed me how to pump.
Once we got home, I continued to exclusively BF. But on Friday night Avery was starving and my milk hadn't come in. Saturday morning when we tried to feed, she sucked so hard for the milk that wasn't there, the ni.pple guards filled up with blood and I was in crazy pain.
So that is when I had my meltdown and we gave her formula. Once I stopped sobbing, I realized that I was no longer 100% responsible for health and weight and it was the biggest weight lifted off of my shoulders. I enjoyed being the one who could take care of her and I liked the bonding of feeding her, but wow, that is a lot of responsibility and stress.
For one week, we only feed her via bottle. During the day it was bre.astmilk and at night it was formula (adding the formula was our plan to begin doing at one month anyways). She took to the bottle no problem and was so happy to eat!
But I wanted to give BFing one last ditch effort, so we went to see our hospital's Lactation Consultant. It is one of the things I love about our hospital, they have an entire department for BFing and if you delivered there you can use them for free!
So we went to see her and she was the same one we had in the hospital and loved!!! We worked on the latch and learning what was right and wrong. Avery will go for bre.ast, even thought she has been on the bottle, which is great, but she will go from a great latch to causing damage very quickly.
The whole experience was very frustrating for her and somewhat overwhelming for me. I really do want to nurse (not exclusively though). But I am not sure if I am up for this.
And because of how quickly Avery goes from good latch to bad latch, even the lactation consultant recommended using the ni.pple guard.
Lately, my hormones have been crazy and I am dreading Ray going back to work, so do I have the strength/will power to make this work . . . .I don't know.
I have so much new respect for those who do BF. It is hard, tiring, and stressful (at least in the beginning).
The good news is that she got weighted at the appointment and is now 7 pounds 10 ounces (as of September 30th), this is 4 ounces above her birth weight!